For anyone, it is an act of humility to surrender to what is. When we surrender, we turn our ego and self-will over to deeper wisdom and improvement. As a creative service provider, there are times when people reach out for Unglitch.io’s marketing strategy, branding strategy, or design expertise. Most are willing to accept they need to hire for what they cannot do themselves for their own business. But some, have trouble surrendering to their hired expert and releasing control. Why?
“It’s My Vision – No One Else Will Understand It!”
We invest a lot of energy into going after what it is we want, and when what we want to elevate our business -behind that energy is a deep longing for something. Success. Acceptance. Acknowledgment. Money. When we let go, stop pulling or pushing, or step away, we feel the impact of that—we might feel loss, grief, terror, or disappointment that someone else can do it better. The sensation of these feelings can be overwhelming and many of us weren’t necessarily taught how to express them; especially as business owners.
When you hire a trusted, proven expert the process only works when the client surrenders to the expert’s knowledge. You wouldn’t hire someone for marketing strategy and management and then undermine everything they do to boost your business because it’s not “your moves” or the path you would take. Your marketing expert has done research on the actual target market you need to serve (and in most cases…) – this is not the target market you had in mind. I don’t know how many times I’ve heard that “everyone is my target market!”. That idea is simply not going to help your business grow.
So let’s say you’ve surrendered to accepting your (new) niche target market. Your strategist, designer, and promoter have presented you with the plan, content, and visuals to grow your brand and build a loyal audience-to-customer fan base. You don’t like it. You find the urge to go back to doing the same thing you have been doing all along by yourself. We all know the definition of insanity, right?
To simply think that your vision will not be understood by anyone else is a big red flag that in fact, is the case. Neither your current audience understands your vision either – because your messaging in your marketing reflects that and you’ve thought all along that you are marketing to please yourself and not your target customers.
“I’ve Been in Business for 20+ Years – Why Do I Need to Change Now?”
Pride, on the other hand, maintains our idealized self-image—the self we think we need to be for self-preservation. Pride presents itself as a kind of invulnerability, or a need to be right or perfect. Because surrendering to an expert is an act of humility and an acknowledgment that out of our perfectly imperfect humanness, our business may be out-of-date and out-of-touch. We’re losing old customers and we are gaining no new ones. In many cases, this is why. While change can be hard and it only gets harder the longer you’ve been doing what you’ve been doing – when questioning do you need to re-think or pivot your business strategies, branding, marketing, etc… The answer 99% of the time is always: “Yes”.
“I’m Not Going To Let You!”
The final point is that some people find pleasure (albeit negative) in not surrendering. The unconscious pleasure we get from holding on to something too long can be a real hard to let go. As I mentioned up top, I’m a creative service provider. As anyone who worked in customer service knows, some people just thrive off making others feel small.
I remember when I was in my early 20’s in this business, this would always ‘erk me the wrong way. I would be reeling from a client’s bad behavior in this arena for days, if not weeks. They would then go onto a naughty list of people I would never work with again. I still have a naughty list, but when you’ve been doing this as long as I have (12+ years), you start to realize that psychology plays a big part in providing anything to your clients.
We state in many new client contracts, that if you are not willing to surrender to what will better your business, you simply will not be able to be helped…but still be billed for our time…